I’ve debated writing my birth story as i’m not really an oversharer of such personal experiences to such a wide audience. However, since so many of you asked for it – here it is in all its glory. To give you a bit of background, the birth of our first daughter did not exactly go to plan. Whilst it was a natural and a fairly quick delivery. I suffered a severe post-partum haemorrhage (PPH). This resulted in a 1.5 litre blood loss, blood transfusion and a short stay in intensive care. All of which made my recovery, certainly in the early days, particularly difficult, and inevitably put me off the whole birthing process again for some time!
Fast forward 3 years though and we were ready to do it again. Albeit this time with a better idea of what to expect, and a plan in place to avoid all the first time issues. We changed hospitals – this time we went to Chelsea and Westminister and opted for a private delivery with an obstetrician in the Kensington Wing. The main reason for this change was because I wanted to have the same obstetrician from the start of my pregnancy all the way through to the delivery. I had numerous conversations with consultants and midwives on the NHS but they were not able to offer me what we wanted sadly.
So…on the evening of March 6th, and feeling every ounce of my 38.3 weeks pregnant, I put Athena to bed and got in the shower at around 8pm. As I got out of the shower I noticed water dripping from me. I didn’t really think much of it, and assumed that the pressure from the baby’s head was making me go incontinent during the last weeks of pregnancy (I think I was going mad by this point!). I quickly went to the toilet though, and more and more came out. At that point, I thought it might actually be my waters breaking. This never happened in my first birth so I didn’t really know what to expect. I shouted for my husband Iain to come upstairs and told him what was happening and then we called the midwives at the hospital. They asked me to check that the water was clear (it was) and then come in when I was ready. Given that I felt fine, both Iain and I were super chilled at this point, but excited that this could be the evening that our new baby was coming into the world. We put the last bits together in our hospital bags and called my brother to come and stay over at ours and look after Athena.
On the way to the hospital I started to have mild contractions (I’ll blame my husbands erratic driving for that!) but they were fairly close together. We checked into our birthing room on arrival and I was examined by my midwife to discover that I was actually 4cms dilated, baby was fine and all my stats were good. Given this was a second baby, and my first labour was relatively quick (I was 10cms when I got to the hospital!), my midwife assumed that I would progress fairly quickly. It was around 10.30pm at this point and I wanted to try and get some rest so the midwife left us and called my obstetrician to update her on my progress. I wanted her with us asap, but equally wanted to make sure that she had enough sleep to deliver our baby safely. I dont really know what I was thinking when I thought I would be able to rest, and at around midnight I called the midwife for some paracetamol. I felt much further along than I was just an hour and a half previously. I was examined again and the midwife said that I was still 4cms dilated but ‘softening’ very quickly. I was quite disappointed at this point as I felt I was in a lot of pain to be just 4cms dilated. My obstetrician then arrived, and I couldn’t have been more relieved to have her there. By this point I was in quite a lot of pain but still breathing through the contractions thanks to pregnancy yoga and hypnobirthing techniques. I asked my obstetrician to examine me again as I was sure I was further along, and sure enough she said I was closer to 8cms dilated already. Because of the blood loss with my first birth I then had a cannula put in and taped up ready for later if we needed it.
The next phases of labour seemed to happen both really slowly and really quickly at the same time. All of a sudden I was vomiting (quite common when the cervix changes so quickly), and then I had a shower as I couldn’t deal with the smell of sick. I could barely stand as the contractions were so strong, and I was so exhausted as I hadn’t slept. I thought I wanted to go in the birthing pool, but then decided I couldn’t move from my hands and knees on the bean bag, and then I wanted to get on the bed. I was a bit all over the place because the pain was so intense and everything seemed to be happening so quickly. Labour is such an out of body experience and you just go with what your body wants to do at this point. I was given some gas and air for the pain, which in all honesty just made me feel a bit ill and light headed. I had not planned to have any pain relief as I didn’t during my first birth and thought I could cope with it, but my god, because this was so much quicker, the pain was so much more intense this time around. I knew I could deal with it as it would be relatively short lived, but at the time you feel like you’re dying haha!
I kept trying different positions to see where I was most comfortable and ended up on the bed on my knees leaning over the back with the amazing midwife massaging my back and Iain holding my hand. All of a sudden I then had the urge to push so I just went with it. I remember my obstetrician telling me over and over that I was doing great and that the baby would be out with just 3 pushes (that was an encouraging lie!) as she could see the head with a huge head of hair. This really motivated me and I did everything I could to muster up some energy. Between lots of smaller pushes and blowing (to avoid tearing), all of a sudden the head was out and I felt a huge sense of relief and calm as the hardest part was over. I was asked if I wanted to catch the baby myself but I was so exhausted I didn’t want to – I was happy to just get it out by this point. My husband also didn’t want to, but he did have a look at the head of hair!
Finally, after 1 hr 9 minutes of active labour and 11 minutes of pushing, our 3.5kg beautiful baby was born and in my arms crying. We left the cord to pulsate until it stopped and then my husband cut it and told me it was a baby girl. We were overcome with love and every other emotion, but I dont think there are any words that can describe those first feelings after the birth accurately. The moment is so sacred and special between you, your husband and new baby – it really is the most wonderful feeling in the world. We lay there for what felt like hours with our new baby daughter, amazed at what had just happened and what we had created. We were now a family of four with two beautiful, healthy girls.
Shortly afterwards I birthed the placenta with some help from the syntocin drip (again requested by me to get it out asap). This time it came out really easily and quickly and was in tact. I then had a couple of surface tissue stitches for a small tear when the head came out. We were then left to get some rest in our room and enjoy our newborn bubble. I was monitored very closely for the next 24 hours for bleeding because of what happened during my first birth and was also put on a syntocin drip for quite a few hours post birth to ensure my uterus was contracting properly. I had requested all of these things to ensure that we had no issues with blood loss immediately after the birth.
I can honestly say that my midwife and obstetrician 100% made this birth exactly how I could have imagined it and more. These are experiences and memories that you never forget. My obstetrician listened to every single thing that we wanted and made the whole experience so personal and positive for us. Whilst we didn’t have a birth plan as such, everything we discussed in the meetings prior to the birth was put into action and at every point throughout the labour I felt in empowered and in control. If I could know that every birth was like this, I would do it again 10 times over! After a short 24 hour stay at the hospital, we all went home, happy and healthy with our new baby daughter and Athena in tow. Filled with so much love and happiness and ready to face the fourth trimester.
Because of my history and previous PPH, I was told to monitor my blood loss closely over the next week or so, and did exactly that. After 7 days, there was hardly any bleeding and I assumed all was fine. But then on day 10 post birth, it became suspiciously heavy again. I immediately contacted my obstetrician who told me to go back in for a scan asap. Much to everyone’s surprise, there was a tiny bit of placenta still inside me and the decision was made to have it removed in theatre the next day. This naturally brought back lots of negative associations for me from my first birth and everything that we had tried to avoid. However, as much as this felt similar, it was a completely different situation and very much under control. I hadn’t lost a lot of blood, it was a simple 15 minute procedure, and it was the safest way to ensure I would be fine and could recover. So I had the procedure at 8.30am on the 19th March and stayed in hospital until that evening when my obstetrician was happy to discharge me. Savannah came with me the whole time, and everyone was happy to see her again. I really didn’t want this set back to affect my feelings about the birth as they were so positive this time around and still are. I guess sometimes things happen that are out of anyone’s control, and my body clearly does not like to let go of its placenta’s.
So, thats my birth story – from the heart as it happened. I hope you enjoy reading it, and if you’ve had a difficult first birth, know that it is possible to have completely different and positive experience the second time around.
Lisa
xoxo
